That spark.

The most surprising thing I have discovered about myself this year is that I am a hopeless romantic.

I have always resisted this sentiment and pontificated the absurdity of love. Relationships are meant to fail, no such thing as a soul mate blah blah blah.

But now, here I am, exactly where I was about 2 years ago. Totally and completely full. The balance has been found between work and play. So far I have raised three of the most well adjusted, bright and beautiful children. I have a busy social life, work is good.

I feel 100% complete again.

And for me this means dating again....which brings me to "the spark".

The one place I have never failed is dating. What can I say, boys seem to love the single mothers! Let me clarify, I'm no prized pig, however, I suspect a lot of men are just as tired of wistful folks who "love to laugh---LOL" as I am so we seem to have a common ground.

And I would be lying if I denied the presence of an ego boost.

So I date. I have seen the good the bad and the tragically hilarious. It's fun. An escape from real life.

Dating comes in all shapes and sizes. We have the coffee dates or the dinner dates. Hell, us really fortunate folks might even have a stunt cock we call friend......but relationships? That tricky.

We have them. Then we fail at them. We have all been there from one time or another yet for some inexplicable reason we keep going back for more. And I often wonder why?

But now I think I know what drives me.

The spark

It's that instant, unmistakable, overpowering and all consuming spark. The fireworks as "they" call it. That fierce driving force that blows every single shred of common sense out of your body and forces you to take a chance despite all facts, all warnings from friends and most of all, objective reasoning. You never want to leave their side, you jump every time the phone rings.....and you wonder what te FUCK is WRONG with you!

I have had this exactly once.

And I gotta say that while my wee little heart was smashed in a million little pieces......it isn't anymore.....and looking back I wouldn't trade it for the world.

And I will never again settle for anything LESS than those explosive fireworks. What a rush it is, risking it all for the sake of love! How quaint! How positively romantic! I mean, I take risks with my stocks....but with my heart!? That's risky shit!

Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't and who knows, I may never have it again!

But I'll never settle for less.


This is just one more area where I consider myself to be one of the most fortunate people out there. Where it matters, and I mean REALLY matters....I have succeeded.