Parenting (or laziness) personified.

A wee while back an ex boyfriend called me a shitty mom. It stung until I shook my head, considered the source and the fact that the both of us forgot we were adults during a needlessly volatile breakup. This allowed my over inflated ego to take over and squash all thoughts of insecurity surrounding my parenting styles....until today.

It's Halloween. Kids love Halloween! Especially mine who are under the grossly misinformed impression that I am some kind of health nut who NEVER allows her little darlings the luxury of treats. What can I say, my approach for this time of year is to let them eat it until it's gone. Smarties for breakfast? Have at it. The sooner it's gone the better. They can eat it till they are sick for all I care....after all, the greedy little shits worked for it.

Having said this, it's cold and rainy this time around. The thought of wrangling a bunch of cold, wet kids, half of whom are pissing and moaning while the rest want to soldier on makes me iwant to slit my wrists.

My solution? BAIL!

So, I got to work preparing a Halloween candy hunt and the kids ravaged the house like a pack of zombies in search of bloody flesh.

So, here I am, a shitty Mom, curled up with her healthy, dry and warm girls while all dressed up, watching Halloween movies and eating the 50 bucks worth of candy I grabbed to compensate for the lack of trick or treating. The best part is there are no shitty coupons or pennies or toffee kisses to throw out!

Life is all good....and my reputation as the best Mom ever is still intact.